We stood and were hypnotized by the moon the other night...
a white grey hound and I,
we stood there silently in the breeze...
as the moon pulsed magnificently,
I heard birds singing....
in the latest hour of the night,
and at deep dark black...
I hear them each time,
geese shrieking through the sky...
and Behold,
I hear a story upon the breeze...............
We are withering in the dark water,
watching our skin be worn away with the tide...
and our hearts melting through our feet,
we feel the sensations leaving our fingertips...
and we know that we are dying,
a sickness in our soul they said...
we have been commanded to wear the faces of demons,
and bear the jesters grin despite the pain...
we run our lives upon the blade edge,
and really...
only beauty is achieved through the cuts we receive,
So we decided one night...
to sew wings upon our back,
to stare into the midnight madness...
and directly into the heart of the storm,
we faltered upon our windowsills...
and felt the rain caress our faces,
we leapt into the jaws of the abyss...
and then soared our way up high,
we saw the planets spinning....
psychotic twirling orbs of fire and ice,
they whispered things to us...
as we soared through those ancient wind-waves,
up in space...
we felt our hearts falter,
at the shapes that formed in the sky...
and when a darkness of form crept in close,
it took and took...
wrapped its' claws about us,
placed us in cages...
we shook,
we broke...
we wore skulls in our braids,
and placed dark powder upon our cheeks...
we ate little or nothing,
and would stay up all night...
walking through our hallways with the lights off,
reaching and searching for something each night...
that we couldn't remember in the day,
we no longer remember what it is...
or how we became trapped in this maze,
why we are drowning from the inside out...
and why the tears we shed are never in physical form,
we sewed the wings on long ago...
and have forgotten how or why,
and now we are caged up in the sky...
those who tried to fly,
to escape the darkness on ground...
we flew and soared and fled,
only to discover ourselves a prisoner of another kind...
to a darkness that plagues us both body and mind,
the chains they have placed on us are within our thoughts...
and the lights they make us wear have fooled the earth,
the stars we are...
and they have bound us in the night sky,
Eventually...
as aeons slipped by,
we gnawed away at our wings...
at the chains that held them down,
we chewed until our teeth had been filed to fine points...
and our skin was fractured and bled,
yet eventually the bonds we cut...
and the world fell,
about us...
we wept for our wings,
as we plummeted deep into the abyss...
its jaws open and reaching and pulling us into the black,
is there only darkness and sadness?
We ask each other,
we are too young to be feeling this sad...
yet we do,
yet we are...
and often we think we should have died when we fell,
that our bones would scatter across the earth...
and the shadows would forget us,
yet...
we hear,
something......
We see amidst the darkness that swamps us,
a hot air balloon...
the palest of blues,
we run from our captors...
from ourselves.
Scramble into the basket and feel ourselves lifting out from the mire,
and then there is the blue...
it is all we see,
an ocean vast and beautiful...
and a city by its' shores,
and then...
we feel ourselves start to change,
white feathers...
trembling skin,
the smallest of true hearts...
and we are given what we never dared to desire,
Escape.
What are you trying to escape from? Is there escape? Maybe escape is an illusion. Maybe it's not.
I went to the smallest of venues last night in the heart of Brisbane, to see my brother rock the stage. [He's awesome, btw]. A mesh of painted faces, old school class, screaming and motorbikes...whatever indulgences could be had.
We are always lost I think...but occasionally we come across a piece of something - maybe even a piece of us - lying amidst the fog and snow, and we add it to us. We're still lost, but slowly the fragments are being gathered. Then maybe life won't feel like this.
Much Love,
Miss CLScarlett xx
